BEULAH LAND- Piano, West Coast Baptist College

Saturday, March 22, 2008

"I Love You"

“Trust Me, My child,” He says. “Trust Me with a fuller abandon than you ever have before. Trust Me, as minute succeeds minute, every day of your life, for as long as you live. And if you become conscious of anything hindering our relationship, do not hurt Me by turning away from Me. Draw all the closer to Me, come, run to Me. Allow Me to hide you, to protect you, even from yourself. Tell me your deepest cares, your every trouble, Trust Me to keep my hand upon you. I will never leave you. I will shape you, mold you, and perfect you. Do not fear, Oh child of My love, do not fear. I love you”
-Amy Carmichael

“Am I Sufficient For Thee?”
by Rebecca L. S.

The sun glistens on my face, and the breeze flutters through my shoulder length hair. I saunter down the familiar street I am walking on. As I come to the end of Familiar Street, I turn down another street; I know where I’m going. My mentors told me the way; they wrote the directions on a sheet of paper just for me.

“Down a familiar street,
Turn left on Find Your Dream lane,
Walk for two miles,
Take a right onto Success and Wealth,
And another right onto Career Drive.
Once you’re on that road,
It’s quite a long walk,
Four miles to be exact.
When you hit the end of Career drive,
There’s a fork in the road,
This fork is different, because
Usually forks have two different options
But this one has more. When you get there,
You’ll know what I mean.
Decide which road you want to get on,
And go from there!”

Easy instructions, I decided, as I look over the crinkled paper. I had meditated on these instructions. Folded and unfolded the paper many times, it had been stuffed into my jean pockets and ruthlessly thrown into my backpack on busy days. Now, I cherish the paper, and if I loose my directions I will get lost too easily.

As I turn down Find Your Dream lane, I see lots of options. Big fancy stores line the street- little candy shops full of Pleasure, and big libraries full of the Worlds Knowledge. A printing press is advertising their publishing deals, and those in need of lawyers, doctors, nurses, and teachers line the street, pleading for me to help them.

My mind is overwhelmed.

And then, after I’ve been walking for a mile and a half, I notice someone different. He is tall, his countenance is resigned and meek, and his eyes gentle. I stop walking (which is distinctly against the directions I had been given), and I gaze into His eyes. I see something amazing…Mercy, Grace, Truth, Love, Joy, Peace…

Love…Dreams… I can see it all in His eyes.

And then, He calls my name. How does He know me? I blink a few times, trying to make sure I’m not dreaming. He calls my name again, “My child,” He whispers. I take a step towards Him, “My beloved child, you have come back to Me.”

“This isn’t possible, Oh, my Savior…” I gasp, it is Him. How could he remember me?

“I created you, remember? I saved your soul, do you remember? Calvary…my blood, I shed for you, my child, my love.” He takes a step towards me. “I love you, will you come back into my arms, let me protect you and let me guide you.”

I stop again; I want to take another step forward- but what about my directions! What about them? I close my eyes and shake my head, fighting back the tears.

Gulping nervously, I take one more step closer to Him, and I see Him taking another step towards me. With each step I take, he takes another one too. After five or six steps, I am right beside my Savior who had died for me so many years ago. And then, I can feel His tender embrace.

The directions my mentors had given me are still in my fist, crinkled in the palm of my left hand. As I embrace my Savior, I can scarcely breathe. How could He still love me? I hadn’t spoken to Him for days- weeks perhaps, and here He was, taking me back as if I had only spoken to Him yesterday.

“My Child, you have come home. Have you Found Your Dream yet?” His voice smiles at me.

“Oh, no, not yet…” I stutter through the words, “See, there’s so many things. Candy shops, I mean, you created me, God, you know I like candy and pleasure…and then there’s wealth, and that just amazes me as well…really alluring, but then I see all the sick people, and those in need of knowledge…and my heart aches for them. I don’t know what my true desire is…and these directions here tell me I am only allowed to walk on this road for two miles, and then I have to take a right turn onto success and wealth.” I hold up the old directions.

“Where did you get these directions?” My Savior tenderly caresses me.

“Oh, from my mentors of course. They say this path works, and I am confident it will.” I hold my head high.

“I’m sure it will too,” My Savior paused, “That is, if your dream is a dream of success and wealth…and if you desire pleasure in this world…but what about me? Have you forgotten me? You once pledged your life to me, I bought you- remember?” His words cut into my heart, He did buy me…I had begged Him to, and He did…with His own blood. “What about me? I love you.”

I am uncomfortable at first. But as I think, as I meditate on his words, it becomes more real to me.

“I love you too, I do. But…do you have directions for me? Where will we go? What will we do with my life with you? What will all of my friends and mentors think? What will they say?” I sound silly and childish as I speak, even to myself.

“My Child,” He chuckles, “I love you, I died for you, have you forgotten the promises I have given You in My Word?”

I draw in a deep breath, “No,” I whisper, I remembered them all.

“Trust me. Follow Me. Abandon these foolish directions, these selfish desires and glass dreams. I have greater plans for you than this. There is a world of people who do not know me, and I want you to take me to them. I love you, remember? If you trust me, I will protect your breakable heart. I created you, I breathed life into you…I love you. Will you love me? Will you follow me?” His eyes plead with me.

The promises of His word, His love, His death, His life; all of Him suddenly becomes real and alive to me.

As I gaze up to my Savior, the crinkled paper I had been clinging to so foolishly fall to my feet. My Lord smiles, and I, with tears in my eyes reach out, and take His hand as He offers it to me.

“Am I sufficient for thee?” He asks.

“Yes.” I whisper, tears flowing uncontrollably down my face, “Yes, You are more than sufficient.”

Holding my hand in His, I followed Him, and He is now lead me down a different path, not the path of Find Your Dream, or Success and Wealth, or even Career Drive, no, this one He calls The Way.

1 comment:

Tiffany said...

Wow, Christ's love is inexplicable! That is a wonderful story, and you're a great writer! Thanks for sharing and reminding me how incredible Christ's love is!

~Tiffany Kaye (A fellow Rebelutionary)